I hate Mondays, and this Monday wasn’t the exception. I miss the quarantine. The end of lockdown has been hard on me.
I think I became antisocial…
Before I go into detail on why this Monday was a hard one, let me tell you how the end of lockdown has been going so far. However, if you follow me on Instagram, you got an idea. Anyways, I think after 2 months home, I became antisocial.
I never thought I’ll write this someday, but seeing people STRESSES me out. It drains me. I get tired. Literally! Then it causes some kind of panic attack. I’m scared shitless of COVID-19. So if someone comes too close to me, I freak out. If a person doesn’t wear a mask or if she/he does but touches the mask and does not sanitize their hands: I go nuts. Let’s not talk about sneezing or coughing!! You get the picture! Home is my shelter. I feel safe and not “exposed.” Since May 11th, it’s hell. I’m working on my fears and I’m even thinking of seeing a specialist.
The ear infection
Other reasons why lockdown is tough: the ear infection story. Do I need to explain it again? Ok, one last time. Sorry my Instafriend, you’ve heard the story a billion times in stories. Well, a cotton swab got stuck in my ear causing a hell of infection (fever, swollen tonsils, antibiotics, etc…).
It isn’t a big deal in reality however, it’s adding up to the “not feeling 100 feelings.” So when you already feel shitty… you finish the sentence! I still believe it’s all about the bare essentials but lately life is throwing lemons. I’m busy repurposing them.
Now the cheery on top: my job. Covid complicated things for EVERYBODY. I’m no exception. My contract came to an end today, the 25th of May. My bosses did propose another deal, I said no. I need to process things. Also, now I’m a mom, I think twice. Leaving Monday was hard. Very hard! I don’t know how to explain, but it felt like a heartbreak. Not with my colleagues, we are in very good terms. I was heartbroken because the mission I had in that job was ending on Monday. I will cherish that opportunity forever. You know what they say: “every ending is a new beginning”…. What’s next? the future will tell…
All that to say, I miss quarantine…
Anyways, I’ll talk to you next Monday….